Let Passion Drive You!

QUESTION OF THE WEEK

What are you passionate about?

When I sit down and think about my life, really think, there are so many things I am passionate about. It makes me wonder if you can have too much passion in your life. Can too much passion overwhelm your life, causing you to spread yourself to thin… thus never achieving greatness in any one area?

The following quote comes to mind: “Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.” ~ Harriet Tubman

The thing is I don’t know that I really want to change the world. My passions aren’t about earth-changing, life-altering, global-effecting issues. My passions are about: watching my children live, laugh, and love; experiencing the natural talents as I watch my husband on the golf course; spending quiet time as I put my thoughts on paper creating a new world for my readers; giving my time to the local community theatre and performing on stage with some amazing actresses and actors.

You see, I have had big dreams and amazing passions in my life… they are what took me to L.A. to pursue a career in film… However, what I have discovered, in my Blah Blah years, is that my true passions aren’t out there somewhere in the world undiscovered, but instead they are here, in my home, with my family close at hand.

So, as my all time favorite actress Audrey Hepburn once said, “The beauty of a woman is not in a facial mode but the true beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives the passion that she shows. The beauty of a woman grows with the passing years.”

You see… the love I give to my family is my passion and through them my passion drives me!

October 2019 ~ Book Haul

I LOVE to read… Sometimes my ‘To Read’ list grows a little to large, but those are the times I love the most. Right now, I’m celebrating my amazing OCTOBER BOOK HAUL!

Comment below and let me know how many of these books you’ve read and which one you recommend I start with! If you see something you like and plan to pick up a copy, you can do so by clicking on the book cover, the title, or the [BUY IT HERE] button.

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.


#1 The Starter Wife

by Nina Laurin

Local police have announced that they’re closing the investigation of the suspected drowning of 37-year-old painter Colleen Westcott. She disappeared on April 11, 2010, and her car was found parked near the waterfront in Cleveland two days later, but her body has never been found.

I close the online search window, annoyed. These articles never have enough detail. They think my husband’s first wife disappeared or they think she is dead. There’s a big difference.


#2 The Wife Between Us

by Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen

When you read this book, you will make many assumptions. You will assume you are reading about a jealous ex-wife. You will assume she is obsessed with her replacement – a beautiful, younger woman who is about to marry the man they both love. You will assume you know the anatomy of this tangled love triangle. Assume nothing.


#3 The Other Sister

by Dianne Dixon

One sister has everything. Her twin hates her for it. Would life be better without Ali? Probably. At least then people might notice Morgan. Ali’s always gotten everything-she doesn’t even realize how much Morgan resents her.


#4 The Last Time I Lied

by Riley Sager

Two truths and a lie. Vivian, Natalie, Allison, and Emma played it all the time at Camp Nightingale. But the games ended the night Emma sleepily watched the others sneak out of the cabin into the darkness. The last she – or anyone – saw of them was Vivian closing the cabin door, hushing Emma with a finger pressed to her lips.


#5 Sometimes I Lie

by Alice Feeney

Amber Reynolds wakes up in a hospital. She can’t move. She can’t speak. She can’t open her eyes. She can hear everyone around her, but they have no idea.


#6 Parasite

by Mira Grant

Every six months or so, some conspiracy nut starts in with “what they aren’t telling you” and “These are the things they don’t want you to know,” and you know what? Not one of them has produced verifiable scientific evidence that the Intestinal Bodyguard is harmful in humans.


#7 Paradox

by Catherine Coulter

Author Catherine Coulter delves into the terrifying mind of an escaped mental patient obsessed with revenge in this next installment of her riveting FBI series.


#8 Sleeping Beauties

by Stephen King and Owen King

In a future so real and near it might be now, something happens when women go to sleep: they become shrouded in a cocoon-like gauze. If they are awakened, if the gauze wrapping their bodies is disturbed or violated, the women become feral and spectacularly violent…



When you purchase a book using a link on this site, I earn an affiliate commission. All commission earnings go back into funding my books; editing, cover design, etc.


I huge thank you to my Book Fairy, Stacy Kingsley – zombie author – CLICK FOR HER WEBSITE. PLUS, you should totally check out her books below:

#Theredheadedauthor Presents the October 2019 New York Times TOP 10 Best Sellers – YOUNG ADULT

As an avid reader of fiction (and an author who one day hopes to make the list) I LOVE-LOVE-LOVE checking out the New York Times Best Seller list. So, here it is… The independently ranked top 10 YOUNG ADULT selections for Oct. 2019!

If you’ve read any of the TOP 10 selections and recommend them, please comment below and let me know. If you see something you like and plan to pick up a copy, you can do so by clicking on the title, the book cover, or the [BUY IT HERE] button.


#1 The Hate U Give

by Angie Thomas

A 16-year-old girl sees a police kill her friend.


#2 Five Feet Apart

by Rachael Lippincott

Stella and Will are in love, but they can’t get within five feet of each other.


#3 Children of Blood and Bone

by Tomi Adeyemi

Zelie fights to restore magic to the land of Orisha.


#4 American Royals

by Katharine McGee

George Washington is crowned king instead of president and centuries later, The House of Washington still sits on the throne.


#5 Frankly In Love

by David Yoon

Frank fakes falling in love in order to fall in love for real.


#6 One of Us is Lying

by Karen M. McManus

For five students, a detour into detention ends in murder.


#7 On The Come Up

by Angie Thomas

Bri strives to become a hip-hop star despite numerous obstacles.


#8 Permanent Record

by Mary H. K. Choi

A chance encounter between a college dropout and a pop star turns into a budding romance.


#9 LOKI: Where Mischief Lies

by Mackenzi Lee

Loki is sent to Earth to investigate a string of murders that used Asgardian magic.


#10 With the Fire on High

by Elizabeth Acevedo

Emoni juggles school, work and motherhood while pursuing her dream of becoming a chef.


When you purchase a book using a link on this site, I earn an affiliate commission. All commission earnings go back into funding my books; editing, cover design, etc.


#Theredheadedauthor Presents the October 2019 New York Times TOP 10 Best Sellers – FICTION

As an avid reader of fiction (and an author who one day hopes to make the list) I LOVE-LOVE-LOVE checking out the New York Times Best Seller list. So, here it is… The independently ranked top 10 Fiction selections for October 2019!

If you’ve read any of the TOP 10 selections and recommend them, please comment below and let me know. If you see something you like and plan to pick up a copy, you can do so by clicking on the cover, the title, or the [BUY IT HERE] button.


#1 The Institute

by Stephen King

Children with special talents are abducted and sequestered in an institution where the sinister staff seeks to extract their gifts through harsh methods.


#2 The Testaments

by Margaret Atwood

In a sequel to “The Handmaid’s Tale,” old secrets bring three women together as a Republic of Gilead’s theocratic regime shows signs of decay.


#3 Where the Crawdads Sing

by Delia Owens

In a quiet town on the North Carolina coast in 1969, a young woman who survived alone in the marsh becomes a murder suspect.


#4 Land of Wolves

by Craig Johnson

The 15th book in the Longmire series. Back from Mexico, Sheriff Longmire must deal with a wolf and a killer on the looses.


#5 The Goldfinich

by Donna Tartt

A painting smuggled out of the Metropolitan Museum of Art after a bombing becomes a boy’s prize, guilt and burden.


#6 The Handmaid’s Tale

by Margaret Atwood

In the Republic of Gilead’s dystopian future, men and women perform the services assigned to them.


#7 IT

by Stephen King

The fears of seven teenagers are rekindled in their adult lives by the terrifying title character. Originally published in 1986.


#8 The Girl Who Lived Twice

by David Lagercrantz

Mikael Blomkvist helps Lisbeth Salander put her past behind her in the latest installment of Stieg Larsson’s Millennium series.


#9 Killer Instinct

by James Patterson and Howard Roughan

The second book in the Instinct series. When an act of terror strikes New York, Dr. Reinhart and Detective Needham go after a sociopath.


#10 The Tattooist of Auschwitz

by Heather Morris

A concentration camp detainee tasked with permanently marking fellow prisoners falls in love with one of them.


When you purchase a book using a link on this site, I earn an affiliate commission. All commission earnings go back into funding my books; editing, cover design, etc.


Week 32 – #WritingWednesday Challenge

Today is the 32nd Edition of #WritingWednesday!!!

Remember, #WritingWednesday is an EASY, STRESS-FREE, weekly writing challenge.

  • Read the writing prompt below,
  • Spend 5 minutes writing (in your own voice or the voice of a character you’re writing) whatever comes to mind,
  • DON’T EDIT what you write! IT DOES NOT HAVE TO BE PERFECT!

The goal is 5 minutes of creativity.

Today I am writing in the voice of Austin the main character in my upcoming novel The Beast Within!

Today’s writing prompt:

Write about something you can’t forget!

His voice...
Deep.
Commanding.
Angry.
Slurred, from too many glasses of cheap whiskey.

I can hear it, almost as if he were standing right behind me. Yet he's been gone for years. Long since buried 6 feet under.

He used to scream at my mother and I, but his yelling wasn't what scared me. It was when he got quiet... still... that's when I knew he was really angry.

I'd have to strain to hear him. But it was in those moments, trying so hard to hear... to understand... that I knew pain would quickly follow.

© 2019 Nina Soden


Alright, now it’s your turn. I’d love to see what today’s writing prompt inspires in you. So, if you are willing, go to the comment section below and start typing. Take 5 minutes and let’s see what you come up with! 

Write about something you can’t forget!


What books have made your September reading list? Are any of them on the New York Times Best Seller list? Comment below and let me know, then, CLICK HERE to check out the 10 Ten Best Sellers for September and see which ones you’d like to add to your reading list!


FEAR is INTELLIGENT!

Would you prefer to watch the video tips rather than reading them? CLICK HERE

Today’s #MindfulnessMonday Tip: No one likes to feel afraid, so when you do listen to your subconscious and act accordingly. Don’t judge… don’t doubt… don’t brush it off. Your fear is your subconscious telling you something and you should listen.   

Mindfulness of fear, what is it?

Emotional Mindfulness is staying in touch with your emotions. Therefore, Mindfulness of Fear is staying in touch with your fear and what triggers your fear. Staying present in the moment-to-moment embodied experience of feeling afraid. It means experiencing the sensation of fear, without judging it or trying to push it away. At the same time, mindfulness of these emotions means you don’t have to justify the feelings. Just feel them and act accordingly.

Today’s Mindfulness Exercise:

Emotional Mindfulness

For the next 24 hours, I want you to be open and accepting of all your emotions. Don’t stifle them, don’t ignore them, and don’t judge! Accept your emotions for what they are, your subconscious talking to you and sending you messages about how you feel about certain situations. Allow yourself to feel… everything… This act of emotional mindfulness will help you better understand yourself and keep you grounded in in who you are.

Mindfulness Journaling:

Throughout the day, as your moving through the emotional mindfulness exercise, I want you to take time to jot down what emotions you’re experiencing. Don’t judge them as right or wrong, don’t try to justify them. Simply write down the emotion and a quick note as to what you believe triggered the emotion. You’ll be able to go back to this journal time and time again to see if there is a pattern to your emotional reactions to situations either at work, at home, or among friends and family.

This exercise and journaling are designed to help you accept your emotions and better understand what events and who might trigger certain emotional spikes.

Mindfulness journaling can be very private. However, I would love to invite you to comment below and share your experiences with the ‘Clean a Room Mindfully’ exercise.


Check out my #MindfulnessMonday YouTube Series and don’t forget to click subscribe so you never miss an episode!

Fear is Intelligent

10 Mindfulness Tips for Everyday Practice!

7 Tips for Bringing Mindfulness into Your Life!


Would you like to take the 52-week challenge and experience a more mindful existence? Check out The Invisible You ~ 52 Weeks of Meditations, Activities, and Writing Prompts to Help you Discover You!

I’m certified in Holistic Stress Management and Mind/Body Fitness. I’ve been practicing Mindfulness for 10+ years and am passionate about helping others in their pursuit of a more mindful existence.

Photo by: Mikel Healy

Bright Side by Kim Holden ~ Book Review

Would you prefer to watch the video, instead of reading the review? CLICK HERE

RATING OVERVIEW 4.75 STARS

Writing: ★★★★★
Story: ★★★★
Characters: ★★★★★
Appearance: ★★★★★

AMAZON DESCRIPTION:

Secrets.
Everyone has one.
Some are bigger than others.
And when secrets are revealed,
Some will heal you …
And some will end you.

Kate Sedgwick’s life has been anything but typical. She’s endured hardship and tragedy, but throughout it all she remains happy and optimistic (there’s a reason her best friend Gus calls her Bright Side). Kate is strong-willed, funny, smart, and musically gifted. She’s also never believed in love. So when Kate leaves San Diego to attend college in the small town of Grant, Minnesota, the last thing she expects is to fall in love with Keller Banks.

They both feel it.
But they each have a reason to fight it.
They each have a secret.

And when secrets are revealed,
Some will heal you …
And some will end you.

MY 2 CENTS / THE CRITICAL POINTS:

WOW… I ate this book up, binge reading it in just a couple of days. It is a super-fast read with so much amazing detail.

WRITING (★★★★★): Kim Holden draws you right in with her playful dialogue between life long friends Kate and Gus. Immediately we feel their connection and realize that these two friends have just been separated as Kate left for college and Gus is still home in southern California following his dream of being a Rockstar.

The way Kim tells the story, each chapter from one character’s perspective, really pulled me into the book. It makes you, as a reader, feel more involved and it gives the story an overarching personal feeling that telling it from third person just wouldn’t have accomplished.

STORY (★★★★): This story takes you on a rollercoaster of emotions. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll get pissed… but, if you’re like me, you’ll love every minute of it.

A little warning though, this one is for mature audiences. Topics covered in Bright Side include loss, disease, eating disorders, homosexuality, sex, drinking, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

CHARACTERS (★★★★★): As an author, Kim Holden understands character development. She has to be one of my top 5 authors for character development. She had me emotionally connected, not only to the main character Kate but also with Gus, Keller, and everyone else. Seriously, even Kate’s college roommate, who is kind of a jerk, is written in a way that makes her misunderstood… I found myself wanting to know more about her. Who knows, maybe Kim will write a book for her at some point too.

Kate, also known as Bright Side, is a beautiful person inside and out. She is optimistic in every sense of the word and sadly, life has just not been kind to her. She has been dealt a terrible hand, but she doesn’t let it get her down. With every line… even when she is saying Dude every other word, we get a sense of who she is. That is the magic of good character development.

APPEARANCE (★★★★★): Simple… Intriguing… and totally Bright Side! The cover made me smile even before I opened the pages to meet Bright Side!  

FAVORITE QUOTES:

“Today, my life is awesome. I don’t want to think about tomorrow. Or the day after that. So I repeat to myself: Today, my life is awesome.”

“Don’t judge each other. We all have our own shit. Keep your eyes on yours and your nose out of everyone else’s unless you’re invited in. And when you get the invitation, help, don’t judge.”

“Imagine for a moment that you were free of all the expectations in your life. What would you do? How would you live your life with no one watching? What would your future look like?”

“Do Epic.”

ABOUT THE AUTHOR:

Kim lives in what she calls the greatest city in the world: Denver, Colorado. Some of her favorite things: reading, writing, her husband and her son, her bicycle, Facebook, iced coffee, and music. She also loves dreaming. Her advice to anyone reading this, or any of her books… follow your dreams. It’s never too late. Get started today … heck get started RIGHT NOW! Make your dreams reality.
She loves to hear from fellow readers. So, if you want to reach out, find her on Goodreads at author/show/7445352.Kim_Holden

Check out my YouTube channel and the video review below… and make sure you hit subscribe so you never miss a video.

Also by Kim Holden

GUS (Bright Side Book 2)

This is the story of Gus.
Losing himself.
Finding himself.
And healing along the way.

“ … but the honest-to-God truth is I don’t even know how to function anymore. Bright Side wasn’t only my best friend; she was like my other half … the other half of my brain, the other half of my conscience, the other half of my sense of humor, the other half of my creativity, the other half of my heart. How do you go back to doing what you did before, when half of you is gone forever?”

Note from the author: Due to strong language and sexual content, this book is recommended for mature audiences.

FRANCO (Bright Side Book 3)

Franco Genovese is the drummer for world renowned American rock band, Rook. He’s got it all. A killer smile. Tattoos. Talent. Razor sharp wit and humor. And a heart as big, and generous, as they come.
Life is good. Steady. Uncomplicated. Just the way he likes things.
Until one night at an unassuming L.A. bar changes everything.
Enter Gemma Hendricks.
She’s a successful young architect from Northern England with an adorable smile, sarcasm for days, and an unparalleled trusting heart.
The attraction is instant.
So is their friendship.
It’s also temporary because they’ll both be heading home, thousands of miles apart from each other, in a few days.
Or is it?
There’s something Gemma wants more than anything else.
And when Franco propositions her to provide what she’s looking for, everything changes.
Will it transform friendship into love, or will it be their ruin?

THE OTHER SIDE

There are two sides to every story.
The surface reality that’s presented to the world…
And then there’s the other side.
The real one.
The one that matters.
Seventeen-year-old, self-proclaimed asshole, Toby Page, is alone.
No friends.
No family.
He trades maintenance work in exchange for room and board.
Every day he fights demons no one else can see.
Every day he wants to give up.
But he can’t.
Not yet.
When Alice Eliot moves in downstairs, she offers Toby some light in his dark world.
At a crossroads and barely hanging on, it’s hard to have perspective.
It’s difficult to see your own worth when you’re the villain in your story.
Luckily for Toby, Alice brings things out in him that no one else ever has.
As the two sides of Toby’s story are revealed, and the full reality comes into view, truth is gained, unlikely heroes emerge, and improbable alliances prove that kindness is fundamentally human.
The question is, Will it all be enough to save him?

ALL OF IT

Seventeen-year-old VERONICA SMITH has it all: a loving family, a funky car named Jezebel, and a plan to go to college after graduation. On the first day of senior year, she meets DIMITRI GLENN–a mysterious transfer student with gray eyes and a mischievous smile who seems determined to win her heart. But there’s something odd about Dimitri, leading Veronica to wonder if there’s more to him than meets the eye. Before long she finds herself in a whirlwind romance that seems too good to be true–until a series of devastating events leaves her questioning everything. It’s not until she chooses to think with her heart instead of her mind that she can rise from the ashes to learn the truth of their connection.

SO MUCH MORE

This is a glimpse into divorce: the lead-up, the aftermath, and the redemption that follows.
Love is strange. It comes out of nowhere. There’s no logic to it. It’s not methodical. It’s not scientific. It’s pure emotion and passion. And emotion and passion can be dangerous because they fuel love…and hate.
I’m now a reluctant connoisseur of both—an expert through immersion. I know them intimately.

When I fell in love with Miranda, it was swift and blind. She was the person I’d elevated to mythical status in my head, in my dreams.
Here’s the thing about dreams, they’re smoke.
They’re spun as thoughts until they become something we think we want. Something we think we need.

That was Miranda. She was smoke.

I thought I wanted her. I thought I needed her.

Over time reality crept in and slowly dissected and disemboweled my dreams like a predator, leaving behind a rotting carcass.

Reality can be a fierce bitch.
So can Miranda.

And I can be a fool…
who believes in dreams.

And people.


Unplug and Recharge! #MindfulnessMonday

  #MindfulnessMonday 9/9/19

Would you prefer to watch the video tips rather than reading them? CLICK HERE

#MindfulnessMonday Tip: Anne Lamott said it best when she said, “Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.”  

Why should we unplug?

Our lives have never been more automated than they are right now. We have instant access to information, which fifteen or twenty years ago would have been unheard of. Yet, with all these advances which are designed to make our lives easier and more efficient, we still spend less time resting then we ever did before. Hence the need to unplug and recharge!

Unplugging doesn’t necessarily mean sleep… it means rest. Rest from the constant overload of technology. It means to take a break, both physically and mentally. Step away from the screens, from 24/7 connection, and allow yourself to find calm, peace, and stillness.

The loss of truly recharging sleep, that so many of us experience, is a huge and sadly common factor in daily unhappiness and increased stress.

Our brains and bodies are resilient, but the more we add to our to do list, the more screen time we allow ourselves, the more stress we add to our daily lives the less rest we get when we actually lay down at night. A lack of restful sleep can lead to not only increased stress, depression, and a feeling over overall fatigue throughout the day – it can lead to severe medical conditions.

I encourage you to see your doctor for advice if you feel that your lack of restful sleep is getting worse or has been chronically poor over a long period of time.

Today’s Mindfulness Exercise:

24 Hour Unplug and Recharge Exercise

This one might be hard for some of you, but the benefits are worth it… I want you to pick a day, 24 hours minimum, where you are going to completely unplug. I recommend a non-work day. Turn off your phone, unplug your computer, television, gaming system, and any other electronic devise that might tempt you.
Spend time outside, reading, playing cards or board games with your friends and family, cooking, whatever activities that make you happy as long as there is no technology involved.

Mindfulness Journaling:

After you’ve completed your 24 Hour Unplug and Recharge Exercise, spend five to ten minutes journaling how the exercise made you feel. Its completely normal to have experiences a little anxiety about not being socially connected. Its even normal to experience the fear of missing out. Record everything you felt, good and bad, that way when you complete the exercise the next time you can see if and how these emotions have changed. The more often you complete the exercise, the easy you will find it gets.

Mindfulness journaling can be very private. However, I would love to invite you to comment below and share your experiences with the ‘Clean a Room Mindfully’ exercise.


Check out my #MindfulnessMonday YouTube Series and don’t forget to click subscribe so you never miss an episode!

Unplug and Recharge!

The Power of Napping!

10 Mindfulness Tips for Everyday Practice!

Mindfulness in the Workplace

7 Tips for Bringing Mindfulness into Your Life!


Would you like to take the 52-week challenge and experience a more mindful existence? Check out The Invisible You ~ 52 Weeks of Meditations, Activities, and Writing Prompts to Help you Discover You!

Photo by: Mikel Healy

I’m certified in Holistic Stress Management and Mind/Body Fitness. I’ve been practicing Mindfulness for 10+ years and am passionate about helping others in their pursuit of a more mindful existence.


WHOOMP! WHOOMP! WHOOMP! (4 Chapter Short Story)

Whoomp! Whoomp! Whoomp!

The Day the World Stopped Making Sense

by Nina Soden

Dedicated to Wayne and Tanja Miller

©2019 Nina Soden

Based on the character Lynne Loveless and the fictitious facts of the play BAMGILA written by Wayne Miller the leader of Evil Cheez Productions

CHAPTER 1

I’m sure you’ve heard the story of the tragedy that befell Southern Alabama on the day Bamgila made his way out of the bay. It was over twenty years ago, August 2019, and I still remember it like it was yesterday.

Thousands were killed, more were injured, and hundreds were left homeless as billions were reported in property damage. It was a miracle how the community came together, over the five years following the tragedy, and rebuilt the city from the ashes left in Bamgila’s wake.

In order to explain what happened, I first have to tell you how it was that I came to live in Southern Alabama. I wasn’t born there, nor did I choose to make Mobile, Alabama my home; it was forced upon me. The journey had started ten years before Bamgila’s invasion in the summer of 2009. My husband, David, moved me, and our then 4-year-old daughter, Darby, from our home in Northern Washington to the depths of Alabama.

David’s work was transferring him, whether I liked it or not. He had cheated and I had considered letting him go without us, but for Darby’s sake, I decided to give our marriage one more chance. I had hoped that a new start would do us both some good. Besides, I had learned that my best friend from high school, Susan Miller, now Susan Garrison, had moved down to Mobile, Alabama about fifteen years earlier after marrying her husband. I hadn’t seen her in over twenty years, but we still talked from time to time and of course, we kept in touch through social media. Susan was a very successful real estate agent, with her own firm and a wall full of awards. She helped us find a home, my dream home, with a wrap around porch and a backyard pool.

Susan’s husband, Gill, helped get me a job at WCHZ, a local radio station. I quickly made a name for myself at the station and my co-workers became my family. I worked as an anchor, along side Walsh Chandler, one of the world’s most conservative republicans. He made Rush Limbaugh look liberal. Walsh and I never really saw eye to eye, but I suppose our disagreements made for entertaining radio. Deep down, I always knew Walsh had a soft side. That night, in the basement of the station, Walsh showed his true colors. He proudly exited the closet and came out to all of us while declaring his love for his secret lover, Douglas. If only he hadn’t died that night, I think we would have become fast friends.

Working in media, you’re trained to hold your composure. Don’t show fear or emotion, that’s the number one rule. It’s to easy to evoke mass panic if the audience hears fear in your voice or see’s it in your eyes.

It’s hard… It’s hard trying to encourage others and spread hope when you know people all around you are dying, if not already dead.

That night, the world grieved for the loss of thousands, but in that basement, we grieved for the loss of our co-workers—our family.

Until you’re in a situation like the Bamgila Invasion, which is what the history books are now calling it, you can’t possibly understand the pain and suffering that comes with such a loss. The decisions I made, hoping to keep myself and those I loved alive, and the relationships lost in those endless moments of fear will forever haunt me.

CHAPTER 2

The day started like any other Tuesday, except instead of dropping Darby off at school on my way to work she came with me. She was suspended, three days for skipping class. I suppose I can’t blame her; kids tend to lash out when their feeling stress. Darby’s life had been turned upside down, not once but twice. The most recent being the summer before she started ninth grade when her father decided to leave, moving into a flat in the city with his twenty-three-year-old mistress, Bambi.

Bambi had been Darby’s nanny, up until she turned twelve, and had spent many family vacations and backyard BBQs with us over the eight years she worked for us. It turns out her benefits package was better than my own. She walked with a new condo, money in her pocket, and my husband at her side. I got the house, 75% custody of Darby, and no alimony because David lost his job a month before our divorce became finalized.

When I found out Gill was cheating on Susan, with Crystal one of the stations anchors, I lost it. I gave him an ultimatum, tell Susan before their next anniversary or I would. That gave him five and a half months to decide how to do it, but it didn’t take that long. About two months later, Susan had cornered him in the den, demanding to know the truth. In Gill ultimate wisdom, he confessed thinking he had no other choice. It turns out, Susan had no idea about the affair and only wanted to know how he could possibly spend $2500 on golf clubs without talking to her first. I’m only thankful that Susan didn’t have to live with that pain for too long.

The very next day, Bamgila came walking out of the bay. I won’t go into the gory details of how Susan died, I don’t want to relive those memories. Over twenty years later and her death is still just as painful today as it was then. In fact, I’m tearing up just thinking about her now. If you had known Susan; her passion for life, her extraordinary lust for excitement, and her never ending love of friends and family, you’d understand the gaping hole her death left in all of us.

CHAPTER 3

Darby and I made it into the station about seven o’clock, in the middle of Sunny Storm’s morning weather report. She was a twenty-something, brunet with dreams of one day becoming an actress. The problem she ran into wasn’t a lack of talent, no, it was that no one was looking for fresh talent in L.A. That’s lower Alabama to those of you who haven’t lived in the south, not to be mistaken with Los Angeles, California.

Sunny’s personality was much like her name, sunny. She was eager to learn and although many of the men in the office saw her as a ditz, I knew better. She was a social media wizard. She had over ten thousand followers on Instagram and double that on Twitter. I’m not sure why they were so fascinated by pictures of what she ate for breakfast, lunch, and dinner which she posted on a daily basis. However, I will admit I often found myself getting lost in her ramblings whenever she posted videos.

Gill was always the first one in and the last one to leave at the end of the day. He greeted Darby and I moments after we walked in. I could tell something was wrong, but with Gill you never know if it’s a stubbed toe or a plane crash, everything is over the top with him. Either way, I had my own drama going on, trying to deal with Darby and her recent acts of defiance. By the time I got Darby out of the lobby and settled into a quiet place to nap before hitting the books, Gill was half way into his story about how Susan had pulled the truth out of him. I wont lie, I was glad she finally knew. I hated lying to her.

By the time Gill was done ranting, I had barely finished my first cup of coffee. Kenny Kramer, the WCHZ office intern, came bumbling into the lobby in a very Cosmo Kramar way. If you’ve ever seen Seinfeld, the early 1990’s sitcom, then you know what I mean. The irony that his mother named him after Michael Richard’s character Kramer is not lost on anyone who meets him.

Kenny proceeded to bombarded Gill and I in the lobby, going on and on about something he found amazing and world altering. It wasn’t until Gill turned on the television and the image of Bamgila filled the screen that I realized Kenny had no idea how right he really was. Now, don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t excited about Bamgila’s existence, not like Kenny was. No, I was terrified, much like the rest of the world.

In a matter of hours, less than twenty-four, Bamgila had appeared as if out of nowhere. He walked out of waters of Mobile Bay defying all laws of physics and whether maliciously or not, wreaked havoc across the state. Fire exploded from his mouth, vehicles and buildings were crushed under the weight of his mass, and lives… so many lives were sacrificed to his will. The whole city fell under his shadow. We were all at his mercy, but Bamgila showed no mercy.

CHAPTER 4

Skip Starke was the sports anchor back then. No one really took him to seriously, though. He presented himself like a has been football player who thought he should have been more. To be truthful, the only reason I even remember his name was because he had professed his feelings for me only thirty minutes before Bamgila took his life. He didn’t go without a fight though.

Charging toward the fire breathing monster, Skip managed to put two bullets right between the monster’s eyes. It didn’t make a difference, they barely penetrated the skin, but that isn’t what mattered. What mattered was that he had done it, bravely and selflessly, in an effort to save us all.

The weather girl, Sunny Storm, or rather Ethel Eugenia Furbish as we learned that night, was never found after the attack. Members of the National guard were sifting through bodies for months, identifying those they could and contacting family members if any were still living. Sunny’s body never turned up. There have been reports, over the years, that she had run out of the building, heading west, and never looked back. Some even say she kept running until she reached the Pacific Ocean. Considering she only owned four-inch heels, I find it hard to believe she could have run that far. I’m sure she called an uber as soon as she was out of the state, but you never know. Secretly, I hope she did make it all the way to California. I hope she changed her name, again, and took up acting out on the golden coast.

Crystal and Gill ended up throwing a huge party a few months after the event. They called it a funeral, to honor Susan’s memory, but it was a party. The only thing Susan would have liked about the party was all the alcohol. Everyone was drinking in her honor and somehow it felt like she was there too. I couldn’t stomach it, I still missed her too much. Life just wasn’t the same without my friend. I ended up leaving thirty minutes in, just after Crystal announced she was pregnant… with twins. Somehow that didn’t stop her from taking shot after shot of Gill’s expensive tequila thought.

Kenny, the WCHZ intern, who Walsh had hired must to my chagrin ended up being my hero. When Darby and I attempted to get away from Bamgila, I lost hold of her hand. She slipped right out of my fingers. I searched through the rubble for what felt like days trying to find her. Then, after hours of interrogation by General Stone of the U.S. Army, Kenny brought her back to me. I will forever be grateful to him.  In the twenty years since the incident, Kenny has continued with WCHZ, moving his way up the ranks until just five years ago, I heard he had been promoted to General Manager in charge of all programing. He has turned into a fine man and has done the station, and all of us old-timers, proud.

The high school my daughter attended, like most of the city, was demolished. She ended up completing the year, and her next three, through a virtual academy out of Texas. She graduated with honors and moved back to Washington to attend university. She came down every few months to visit, but once she got married, I decided it was time to pack up and move back up north too. I let go of my wrap around porch and backyard pool, in exchange for living just down the street from my two beautiful grandchildren; Sydney and Ethan. I wouldn’t give that up for all the world.

Whoomp! Whoomp! Whoomp! ©2019 Nina Soden

Love Like This by Nina Soden

The other day I heard a song, it wasn’t short but it wasn’t long.

There were no words just a tune, it said to me you’d be here soon.

Though I never met you, and I’ve never seen your eyes so blue.

I knew your heart was filled with love, just like that of a pure white dove.

The sun did shine upon me, and my heart began to see.

My life would not be lived alone, because a love like this I have never known.

Dedicated to my blue-eyed baby girl. Mommy loves you.

(c) copyright 2008 ~ Nina Soden

For more poems, check out by collection on Amazon: Private Words Unspoken